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    Opposites Attract?

    created by ChocolateLover 1360 days 18 hours 53 minutes ago

    Category: World

    Opposites Attract?

    When it comes to relationships, do you think opposites attract? Or do you think similar people get along better? Or is it somewhere in the middle?

    Think about the best couples you know, do they seem to be opposites?

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    Hey Chocolatelover,

    I think that there needs to be a balance of some sort of interests. I would not say that my boyfriend and I are extremely alike, but we do have a lot of similar interests. We have the same major and therefore we are really into cameras, film and photography. We like to go out and take pictures together and I love sharing that interest with him.

    What I like about him that is different than me is going out and doing things rather than sitting at home and being lazy. He is a go getter and I like that because it motivates me to be like that as well.

    I think that opposites can attract as long as they are willing to try each others interests out. It is important to be open minded to both ideas. I have had plenty of best friends that have completely different interests that me and I have some that are just so different.

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    Hello ChocolateLover!

    I think people who are opposite in some ways, and similar in other ways attract. More like puzzle pieces that make up a whole, than like two identical pieces, or two joined pieces that don’t fit together in the big picture.

    For instance, I am an English major whereas my partner is an Art major. We don’t have to compete since we’re in different fields, we both enjoy time mutually working on our own passions, and we’re both creative thinkers who like to talk about and hear about the other person’s stories, work, art, etc.

    This even works in practical ways. I don’t mind taking out the trash, cleaning the litter box, washing the dog, doing the dirty and heavy stuff—chores that my partner would rather not do. I, on the other hand, am not the greatest chef and don’t prefer doing dishes, but my partner loves cooking and doesn’t mind dishes a bit.
    If we both liked cooking, or neither of us wanted to do dishes, then we wouldn’t fit together as well as we do.

    My mom and step-dad are both writers, but my mom prefers poetry and autobiography, where my step-dad thrives with novels and short stories. Both writers, but different styles, so they don’t have to worry as much about competing with each other.

    The best couples I know are yin and yang to each other.

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    I think you need a little of both in order to reach a proper balance. Some things are better when they are more similar and others are betters as opposites.

    My closest three friends are all pretty similar to me in a lot of ways. We talk the same language (figuratively) and view the world similarly.

    With one in particular, we share pretty much no interests but we understand each other in a way that surprises most people who witness it. We can finish each other's sentences and communicate without speaking and this did not start only after spending a lot of time with each other.

    I don't expect everyone to find someone like that and I certainly don't look for that in my own relationships but I think it goes to show what is important to be similar. It can supersede other differences.

    Mode and method of communication needs to be similar so that there can be clearly understood communication. If one person talks primarily in the abstract, theoretical sphere while the other communicates exclusively on a practical level, it will be very difficult for them to communicate effectively.

    Interests, on the other hand, are less important. Those are more things that can go either way. It can both help and hinder the relationship to share similar interests, depending on the couple and how they approach those interests.

    One area which frequently lends itself to being helpful as opposites is how they relate to responsibility and time. For someone who is more scatterbrained, a partner who is more practical can be helpful. They can both benefit from the relationship. But too much of an extreme, in either one or both partners, could cause more conflict over time rather than help. So a balance is always important.

    It's hard to put an exact formula on what is going to work and what is not. Different couples are different and what works for one might not work for another. And sometimes the most unexpected combination ends up being the most successful.

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    Balance!! I’m all about balance in life. I know I've said this multiple times before this week, but can I really emphasis it enough?? Balance is essential, there is no way around it.

    So that being said there must be balance between opposites and similarities. That's as simple as it is.

    - Maryham

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    I do think that opposites attract, but I also think it is possible for relationships to work when people are similar. My girlfriend and I are a combination of both. We are opposites in some ways and we are quite similar in others.

    For example, I don't really worry about time. I don't really rush. I don't have it in me, it causes stress and I just don't see the need for it. My girlfriend on the other hand is never late unless something happens that is completely unavoidable. I feel like we accent each other with these differences because she helps to keep me on time, and I help her to worry less unless being on time is super important for the task at hand.

    As far as similarities, we are both weirdos. So, it works out.

    I think a combo of the two probably works best.

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    Thanks for the responses guys!! I agree with what pretty much all of you said, that it is somewhere in between and a balance of the two...I just think it is so interesting to see how other relationships work and the ways that this "balance" manifests itself. I love observing people in general, learning about what makes people tick, people watching, etc., and almost nothing is more interesting that the intricacies of a relationship. Seeing how two people function as a unit, the yin and yang as Tobias put it, is just fascinating to me. Sometimes I wonder if there are certain aspects or parts of a relationship that NEED to be constant and others that NEED to be opposite, but there really is no "formula," because people are so unique and therefore so is every relationship. Like a snowflake, haha. Thanks for sharing your examples; it is really so cool to see all the different ways that people can "work" together.

    Re: Opposites Attract?

    I do believe that opposites attract, mainly because people with the same habits or interests can become boring. For example, if you and another person are continuously on the same page it tends to suck the fun out of a relationship. I have learned that the more you contrast with someone the more it pushes you to do things may have not done if it weren't for their input. I think people are more attracted to people opposite of them for the simple fact that they are nothing like each other.

    Why do you think "good girls" go for "bad boys?"I think that the reason these girls chase after these boys because they feel like they are a different person when they are with them. the "bad boys" bring out the inner "bad girl" in the "good girl." I don't know if you all are following what I'm saying but the main fact of the matter is that without the "bad boy," the "good girl" would never realize that there is this totally different person she can be.