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    Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    created by TenkenNoKaiten 1424 days 22 hours 51 minutes ago

    Category: World

    Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Ok so I make it a point to almost never write a forum topic based on what's going on in the newsfeed where we create forums. I'll read a few stories, but they never seem to be that cool.

    This one, however, I just had to comment on. Mostly because it's an idea that I think is either novel, amazingly stupid, or a third option I can't think of yet.

    Apparently, in China (of course) they now have a thing where guys can go into the hospital for something called a taster session . Essentially they attach electric pads to your stomach, and torture you at various intensities to 'simulate the pain of childbirth'. This was done because husbands were being rather unsympathetic to the plight of their wives, thinking that labor and such was a bunch of overblown nonsense or something. Girls give birth all the time, can't be that bad right?

    Well, now they get to be proven wrong, and while I agree that you should sympathize with your wife and do all you can to take care of her during childbirth or pregnancy in general...I don't know if I would electrocute myself so that I could empathize that much.

    So ladies! Would you encourage or appreciate your husband getting electrified at the hospital so he can better understand your pain?

    Would that make you more comfortable having the baby? Do you think it'd make him more sympathetic when he's caring for you after you leave the hospital?

    Guys, would you get zapped in the gut for your wife or girlfriend? Do you think it'd help you relate to the experience more or is this just kind of insane?

    I don't know if I would get zapped...but if it made her feel that much better...

    What do you guys think of this? Crazy? Amazing?

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Wait, the men are doing this voluntarily?! WHY?!

    I'll be the first to tell you that labor is not a fun time. I'd rather stab myself repeatedly in the eye with dull forks while standing barefoot on some hot coals than experience that pain again. I know how much it hurts, and so I don't think I would ever make anyone else experience the pain if they don't have to. That seems like some form of cruel and unusual punishment to make them go through that just to be empathetic. Do any of them really come out of the session any more sympathetic?! Heck, I imagine a lot of them are probably grumbling about how their wives were cold hearted people for making them feel that.

    On the flip side, there are a lot of people who would like to experience the event that is childbirth, yet they are unable to. Though they won't be actually pushing tiny humans out of their bodies and getting the magical moments of meeting said human for the first time, this is probably one of the closest ways to experiencing the process of labor they can get. If there are people out there who really want to feel the pains, and as long as it's voluntary, then hey, who am I to stop you from getting jolted?

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    I'm going to say crazy.

    When my niece was born a couple of years ago, my parents and I, along with my sister-in-law's parents and her brother, were standing outside her hospital room while she was in a long, hard labor. It was a Saturday evening and the hospital was relatively quiet, and I guess for that reason the staff gave us more leeway just to loiter in the hallway. I wasn't quite sure why we continued to stand there other than it seemed - and sounded like - the baby would be born any minute. Three or four hours later, we were all exhausted when we finally heard through the door, "It's a girl!" Let me say quickly I in no way mean to compare our "exhaustion" to that of my sister-in-law, or for that matter my brother who was by her side the entire time.

    While I do believe that, as humans, we always learn best by experience, I do think there are things we can understand well enough vicariously. However, if a man really thought the mother of his child was exaggerating the pain and discomfort of birth and just needed to "suck it up," he might be a good candidate for this simulation. Perhaps for men with that attitude it should be a requirement! If "it's not really that bad," what do they have to fear? :-)

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    I have to agree- this sounds crazy to me. If I were a man I simply can't imagine volunteering for something like this. It's actually pretty funny- I was out having dinner with my sister and our respective boyfriends just earlier this week and we got into a conversation about this very thing. Somehow- some inexplicable turn of events- got the two boys talking about stories of their youth when they injured their... well- their testicles. One got caught on a fence, one got punch in the nads- you know- typical war stories about testicle experiences. At some point my sister couldn't hold it in any longer and just blurted out "CHILDBIRTH", and that was it. From testicle trauma to the trauma of childbirth and it was no contest.

    I don't think I'd make my spouse experience such a thing but I wonder what factor this has on safe sex and waiting til you're ready- maybe it could be some kind of training for potential Dad's or the guys that plant their seed without regard for outcome. Childrearing and birthing is serious business and something that all parties involved should really consider.

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Omgg this is so cool; I've never heard of this. Thanks for posting. Also here is a video I found with two dads experiencing this pain. I can imagine the dads doing this for 6-12 hours. (Hopefully my hyperlink works :)... My first time trying it

    Thanks Meg :).

    I wouldn't "encourage" my husband to do it but I'd ask. If possible, I would love for my husband and I to give "birth" at the same time. My question now is were they given any medication of any sort to ease the pain? I would definitely be interested in "feeling the pain" before I think about having children.

    This method just seem so perfect for those fresh little girls that are on Maury who refuse to listen to their parents and love having sex without considering the consequences.

    Well played China *Thumbs up* :D


    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Oh boy. Lots of about to be dads in a few hours pass out in the delivery room when they hear or see what their lady is going through.

    Almost fathers were not allowed in the delivery room until the 1950s. source In the article that inspired the forum, it says, "Unlike in the West, Chinese men are often not in the room when their partners or wives give birth. Some state-run hospitals do not allow expectant dads to enter, even if they want to." Perhaps they should let expectant fathers in the delivery room.

    Perhaps they should do this to the pro-life men. Especially the ones who think that girls and women who were raped should carry the pregnancy to full term and give birth!

    If my husband ever made me really upset, maybe I'd take him in...

    Erin- Welcome back!

    HC1- Your link worked. I've seen that video before. It is funny. "Ok I have to remember my breathing"..."Don't talk to me right now".

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    AWESOME Topic!!!!

    I have definitely heard of this before and I support it 100%!!

    Yet when I watched the video's of it being done, I can't actually say I think it gives the full effect, but it is an "attempt" and one I think should be appreciated.

    I would certainly tell any woman to allow her spouse or at least mention it, to try this. Men do not understand what a woman goes through in child birth, and this will not make them fully understand, but it is a start, that I think some could benefit from..

    The video's I watched, a few of the men even cried, but it still wasn't no where near what I have went through twice now. I can tell you with all honestly, these were the best moments of my life, but also the hardest. My second son was very painful, as I went completely natural with him & felt every moment, my first wasn't as bad.

    Though I must say, it is not all the birth itself that women speak of when speaking of pain or anything within that nature. It is a combination of the birth and being uncomfortable for 10 months, then the healing process. To me the healing process was the worse part, which can last from about 2-4 months, but really can go a year if not more depending on stitches, complications, etc...

    I love this forum & look forward to hearing from more Cnetters on this, very interested in hearing from both genders on this!!

    Yet again, I reiterate, it is not solely the contractions (which is all they are experiencing with this) it is the pregnancy, the actual pushing and what that takes out of you, then comes the worse part (in my opinion) the healing, especially if you're like me, having to get stitches from tearing or being cut...

    GOOD LUCK to you all in all that you do & each election here!!

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Very interesting idea! I could have used that about 20 years ago!!

    I had a very unsympathetic husband for my four pregnancies. ( I finally traded him in for a more sympathetic model)
    While I was trying to sleep the baby would kick. I would groan or toss and turn in bed. By morning, I was exhausted and he was complaining that it couldn't be that bad.

    So I decided that every night, if the baby kicked I would gently nudge my husband with my elbow. Nothing painful. Just about the same pressure that my tummy was getting from the baby. Boy, did he get angry at me. He yelled at me and told me to cut the nonsense out. Oh Well, he is all alone now and has been for about 8 years! " Who's Sorry now? Who's sorry no-ow?" (sung to the melody of the song of same title.)

    Re: Ultimate Empathy; Experiencing Childbirth

    Elle, yeah they are! Crazy right? Some are totally being coerced by their wives I'm sure, but others are just giving it a shot for fun. They think they can take it, and then they can't, kind funny. I have no idea if it's making men more empathetic, but it's a creative try.

    EKC, I'm with you, lol. I've heard enough about the pain to simply presume that my wife would need my help and support, I don't need to be electrocuted. Vicariously is good enough for me! But yeah the 'suck it up' people can totally get tased, haha!

    Erin, I'm sure me getting kicked in the nuts doesn't compare. I'm back up in like twenty minutes, that's nothing compared to shooting a baby out of my nethers. I think it could help guys be more empathetic, but it certainly won't have that effect on everyone.

    HC1, that would be very funny if you and your husband were both going into labor at the same time, holding hands and shouting about breathing, and you push out a baby and he craps his pants. The wonders of technology, haha! And the people on Maury are so a lost cause, oh they're messed up!

    Loren, I feel like I may not go into the delivery room simply because I think I'd be one of the fainters. I don't like blood, needles scare me, screaming and stretching and shooting out babies would totally take me out. I'll be that cigar dad handing out smokes. And yes, shock that asshole guys, ha!

    Nichole, I'm sure it doesn't give the full effect. Guys don't have to wait 9 months for it, it ends when they want it to, and they can get right up and leave when it's done. Hardly childbirth, but better than nothing I guess right? It shouldn't be so hard to simply care about what your wife is going through.

    Roses, I'm super amused by your idea to poke your ex, that totally sounds like a legitimate means of sharing the experience, but man was he a grumpy bastard! He certainly shouldn't have been complaining, you had a person inside of you! At least now you've got a better model, and are having fun watching the old one rust out on the street, burn!